Five of the Most Awful 80’s Songs That I Secretly Love and You do Too!

So I’m in my mustang convertible, driving to the beach and scanning radio stations for a good cruising tune. Then all of a sudden, the sun rays beam down, the sky opens up and I hear it. The song that brings back memories of my teenage years, it’s awful, silly and makes absolutely no sense, but I crank it up, start banging to the beat on my steering wheel and sing as loud as I can with a huge grin. Sure, everyone is staring at me but who cares?! I’m back in High School again! I shamefully admit, my cruising song was “We Got The Beat” by the Go Go’s, my all-time favorite 80’s girl band, I’m biased and I didn’t put it on this list even though it’s kind of awful.

Without further ado, let me bring you back to the 80’s with this compilation of some of the most awful 80’s songs that we all know and LOVE. These are not by any means in any awful to worst order. They are all equally as bad. My disclaimer: I am not responsible for any of these song’s that will continue looping in your head all day after reading this!

    • “We Built This City” – Jefferson Starship – 1985
      Unfortunately, I know every word to this song! Blender Magazine had it in their top 50 worst songs ever list. I have to agree obviously because it’s on my list, but Jefferson Airplane used to be so cool back in the 60’s with their chart-topping songs “White Rabbit” and “Somebody to Love.” They most definitely fell short in the lyrics of “We built this City” in trying to make a political statement, when all people worried about was how high can they get their hair. anted and where the next party was.  Nobody talked about what the lyrics meant because they didn’t care. The musical arrangement was also kind of sub-par.  It’s just a less than average music compilation that sounded like it was just thrown together. But, somehow, we all can’t turn it off when it comes on!

    • “Mickey” – Tony Basil – -1981
      Oh, how I just love this one so much! Mickey brings back some really great memories of trying to imitate the cheerleading routines from the video. This is the ultimate 80’s anthem; at least I think so anyway. Even though the lyrics are just horrible and Tony Basil sounds like she’s yelling more than singing, we couldn’t get enough of it back then, and still can’t get enough now when we hear it. I bet every 80’s kid has this one in their song library for sure! Fun fact about this song: Did you know it was about Mickey Dolenz from the Monkees? Tony Basil was a dancer and choreographer and starred in the Monkees’ 1968 Movie, Head.

    • “Sunglasses at Night” – Corey Hart – 1984
      Why would you wear your sunglasses at night? Don’t you think that’s a little suspicious? I think women loved the song because Corey Hart was a hottie back then, and the guys just wanted to be Corey Hart and rock their sunglasses at night. Here’s a lyric sample and you can decide if this makes any sense to you, “And I wear my sunglasses at night, so I can, so I can, Keep track of the visions in my eyes.” Not sure how wearing sunglasses can do that, but ok Corey Hart! I will forever enjoy this awful song and continue to crank it up even when I’m 90 years old!

    • “Physical” – Olivia Newton-John – 1981
      This one takes the cake! The song that inspired us to wear headbands, leotards, tights, belts and leg warmers all at the same time while working out. We were sweating with all that stuff on before we even got to moving! I still love jamming to this one and watching the video. Even though Olivia Newton-John is one of the most talented singers in the world, this song shouldn’t have been one of her best hits. Not only was this a chart topper in the 80’s, but nostalgically speaking, it will forever go down in sport’s fashion history. You know you’re singing it in your head right now, aren’t you?

    • “Dancing on the Ceiling” – Lionel Richie – 1986
      “Oh what a feeling, when you’re dancing on the ceiling.” Yes, another awful catchy and ridiculous party song. You can’t keep your ears from listening. When it’s on, it stays on until you’ve got all the 80’s dance moves out of your system. You know you tried to imitate the video when they feature Fred and Ginger doing their routine on the ceiling. Lionel Richie had some really great hits, but “Dancing on the Ceiling” is certainly not his best. Maybe he should have summoned his guys from The Commodores to help with this one, but we still have it as our guilty pleasure nonetheless!

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